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According to the experts, here’s what you should do. The odds of moving forward into a healthy committed relationship with a potential even of marriage is really tiny. It doesn’t mean it can’t happen, it just means the odds are not in your favo Ur. So if you happen to be involved with someone who is separated, which means they are still legally married, you want to at least understand what to expect. And understand from the beginning if you’re dating someone who is separated, which means there are still married, you’ve got to look at the reality of the situation.Another client of mine who is dating a married, but separated man, became very frustrated when he went away on family vacations with his multiple children and his still married to wife. If you’re dating a man or a woman who is still legally married, which means they are emotionally unavailable, that means that are emotionally unavailable to.But as I explained to her, it’s just another sign that he’s not emotionally available. As a matter fact, most of the clients I work with who are or have been in a relationship with someone who is married, but legally separated, they will often say to me that one of their deal killers in love is to date a married person.Now, with this type of open honest communication, they could potentially move forward as friends in a dating relationship, but there was no more illusion about it turning into a full born monogamous relationship anytime soon. But my client at least has become realistic, realistic in the fact that she’s dating a guy for benefits, just like he’s dating her for his own benefit.If you’re dating someone who is separated, legally still married, they are emotionally unavailable. It’s simply means that they can’t give you 100% of their attention. They still have to give the attorneys, money plus effort, they still have to deal with their former wife or husband, and if they have children, they still have to put time into their family life.
Or you can jump to the ultimatum, and see if they’re serious about following through with the words and actually ending their marriage that they’ve been separated from in the past. If you’re going to date someone who is still legally married, don’t be surprised when there’s constant chaos and drama in your relationship with this person.
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Talk about the fact that maybe the best move would simply to be friends with benefits, or a no strings attached relationship until this individual is not only divorced, but after divorce has one year of counseling underneath their belt in order to clear up the past emotional decisions they made in love that did not obviously work. It’s common to jump into talking with this married person about a beautiful future, one filled with puppy dog tails and daisies—instead of honestly talking about the fact that they may not have the time or energy to put into a new person when they still have the stress of divorce, and maybe even still raising children with their still married partner.
Write about the benefits of being honest in your communication with the person who is still legally married.